Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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