idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
it glows. i had to have it.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
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