is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
