So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
