so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
