Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize