my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
