I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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