well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
