I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
