Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
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