Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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