Can i not drive my cunt home
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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