She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
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All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
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I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize