Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
