How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
