oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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