Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
