You're so nebulous sometimes
i will never coherently bang her
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
