He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize