I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
