I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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