I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
