im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
