It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
