just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I have post one night stand depression
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
