I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
