The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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