i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
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Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
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I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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