Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I deserve this hangover.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
