Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize