I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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