At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
