The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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