You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
