butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Randomize
