And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
