Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
