don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
