She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
