i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
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