There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Soap is not a condiment
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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