I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
