I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
