just come out here and I will go home with you...
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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