I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit