Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
