her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize