she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?