one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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